“A solitary tear runs down your cheek, a cheek indeed.
A salty mirror that reflects both your shame and my temporary wooden home.
A bauble of regret that will evaporate far quicker than the years you stole,
Children, grand and great, unseen, unkissed, how unkind.
A part of me that I never felt, camouflaged by cheats and lies,
A deceitful shroud under which I was hidden for the sake of others who knew better.
I did see you that day, through the tent that gave me the oxygen that your love once did,
Lungs that still had the strength to say no, I didn’t want to see you.
Why should I, as the fly that rests on the shiny plaque bearing my name today
Stands closer to me in death than you chose to while I lived.
The staccato rise and fall of a ventilator will never echo to the beat of my broken heart
A heart you broke because you had to.
I loved you before any other man, and I loved you until the day that heart stopped trying.
You spare me twenty minutes when those minutes to me are what years are to you.
You ask me to forgive, to forget, and make our peace.
Proof you never understood for I held no grudge, no malice and never would.
You mourn me today but I mourned you for decades, a child lost to me.
So take your grief and change it, let it become joy.
You only mourn for the things you lost but you have them all, you always did.
My love never ebbed, only flowed, an unconditional torrent that filled my heart at times
Leaving space for nothing else.
I still had your cards and your pictures, your photos and the memories of watching you grow.
You took your stance as you defended your own feelings, your own heart and I felt
Hurt unparalleled, yet pride that you were so strong.
Damning words will now serve as an epitaph for a man who never forgot you.
A man for whom your happiness mattered more than his own.
So turn around now, walk away and smile. I’m entering the fire.
My ashes will fly with a freedom I only ever dreamed of.
You chose you path and skipped along as a lamb, innocent and full of youth.
Today you stand there like a crocodile, with your solitary tear.”
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